4min readFinance 12 December 2019
As a career and life coach for powerhouse women (aka VPs, CEOs, and Entrepreneurs), I've seen my fair share of uber-intelligent women who still struggle to have the level of financial freedom they desire. These are high-performing women in big jobs, and yet they still feel as if they are in a survival mindset when it comes to money.
In my experience, it almost always comes down to their mindset, and that's why I'm sharing my four tips for blowing past money mindset blocks that are holding you back from manifesting the abundance you deserve.
Step 1. Explore if you have any negative associations with money.
We all love money, right? Maybe not.
If you've ever rolled your eyes at someone driving the latest G-Wagon and assumed they were probably a yuppy jerks—you may have issues with money and wealth.
Many of us have some unconscious beef with money don't even realize it—but those negative associations with money can cut off the flow of abundance to you.
So, let's start 2020 off right by letting go of those bad vibes so the sweet green stuff can make its way into your bank account.
Here's how: write down every negative message or conditioning you can remember ever hearing about money—which may have come from society, your family, your profession, or your religion. Then go down the list and write down next to each a positive belief you have. The key is to focus on the positive empowering feelings, so money has a traffic-free lane to manifest to you with no obstacles. For example, instead of telling yourself, "Anyone who has a G-Wagon is greedy and pompous," tell yourself, "Wow, that person must have worked very hard for that car. Good for them. I can't wait until I'm driving my new (insert name of dream car).
Step 2: Quit focusing on your perceived lack of money.
If the bills are piling up and you constantly feel as if you never have enough money—you'll never have enough money. If you live in a studio apartment but shower that space with love and gratitude and feel abundant and rich every time you cross the threshold—you'll put yourself in a wealth mindset.
Try to stop focusing on your bills and start noticing the abundance in your life (e.g. your warm cozy bed and the climate-controlled room, your reliable car that can take you anywhere you want to go, the softness of your clothes that protect you and allow you to express yourself.)
We are surrounded by miracles of abundance all day, and if we can shift our focus towards those high vibes, we will be happier, healthier, and attract more financial wealth.
Step 3: Start believing you deserve money
Feed your brain a steady diet of empowering and motivating content that with have you believing there is no limit to your earning potential. Your initial reaction may be to dismiss positive money promotions, self-help books, and studying the law of attraction as trying to convince yourself of falsehood or lies—and that's fine. It's ok if you start out feeling like you're lying to yourself because you're already lying to yourself. You've been telling yourself the lie that you are not worthy of being rich and abundant. So if we're telling ourselves lies, why not tell yourself a "lie" that excited you, empowers you, and makes you feel good? After a while of feeling your brain with these "lies" of abundance, they will become beliefs. And once they become beliefs, your thoughts and actions will change accordingly, and the money that's desperately trying to get to, you will no longer be blocked.
To manifest abundance, you need to be both a giver and a receiver. It's totally possible that you may be begging for the Universe to help you, but then not being grateful for, or even refusing, what it brings. Your worth was established the day you were born, and nothing you can ever do can add to take away from that divine worth, so stop batting away the money that you inherently deserve.
Step 4: Start adopting the habits of the wealthy
If you want to be wealthy, you have to start acting wealthy right now—and no, that doesn't mean go out and buy a bunch of things you can't afford. There are habits that high achievers have adopted that you can too, and it won't cost you more than your morning coffee.
The most important thing Bill Gates and Warren Buffett attribute their intellect and wealth to? Reading…a lot.
Warren Buffett, the third richest man in the world, has a goal to read 500 pages every single day.
He knows the knowledge gained is priceless.
We are a nation addicted to TV, so I totally understand how the mere idea of replacing your" show" with books may not sound very appealing, but it's so very worth it. Grab a free downloadable book or hit up your local library and pick up a few self-improvement books. Keep them out where you can see them and make a commitment to reading at least 20 minutes a day—then you can fire-up the TV guilt-free.
Another way to get a money mindset is to take one of the many free online courses on money management—Harvard and Cornell even offer a few. Masterclass is another program to learn and invest in your future from the comfort of your couch, all for $99 per course. Online courses are super impactful because not only do you get the opportunity to learn from world-renowned professors, but you can add the course to your LinkedIn profile and resume.
If you much watch TV, try one of the hundreds of educational documentaries on Netflix and every other streaming service out there. The bottom line is to always be learning, and that can be nearly impossible if your TV is stuck on Bravo 90% of the time.
Make 2020 the year that you finally overcome the mindset blocks that are keeping you in financial-mediocrity-land. Start believing and acting as if you deserve wealth, and it will have no choice but to begin manifesting in your life.
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4 Min Read
During a recent meeting on Microsoft Teams, I couldn't seem to get a single word out.
When I tried to chime in, I kept getting interrupted. At one point two individuals talked right over me and over each other. When I thought it was finally my turn, someone else parachuted in from out of nowhere. When I raised and waved my hand as if I was in grade school to be called on (yes, I had my camera on) we swiftly moved on to the next topic. And then, completely frustrated, I stayed on mute for the remainder of the meeting. I even momentarily shut off my camera to devour the rest of my heavily bruised, brown banana. (No one needed to see that.)
This wasn't the first time I had struggled to find my voice. Since elementary school, I always preferring the back seat unless the teacher assigned me a seat in the front. In high school, I did piles of extra credit or mini-reports to offset my 0% in class participation. In college, I went into each lecture nauseous and with wasted prayers — wishing and hoping that I wouldn't be cold-called on by the professor.
By the time I got to Corporate America, it was clear that if I wanted to lead, I needed to pull my chair up (and sometimes bring my own), sit right at the table front and center, and ask for others to make space for me. From then on, I found my voice and never stop using it.
But now, all of a sudden, in this forced social experiment of mass remote working, I was having trouble being heard… again. None of the coaching I had given myself and other women on finding your voice seemed to work when my voice was being projected across a conference call and not a conference room.
I couldn't read any body language. I couldn't see if others were about to jump in and I should wait or if it was my time to speak. They couldn't see if I had something to say. For our Microsoft teams setting, you can only see a few faces on your screen, the rest are icons at the bottom of the window with a static picture or even just their name. And, even then, I couldn't see some people simply because they wouldn't turn their cameras on.
If I did get a chance to speak and cracked a funny joke, well, I didn't hear any laughing. Most people were on mute. Or maybe the joke wasn't that funny?
At one point, I could hear some heavy breathing and the unwrapping of (what I could only assume was) a candy bar. I imagined it was a Nestle Crunch Bar as my tummy rumbled in response to the crinkling of unwrapped candy. (There is a right and a wrong time to mute, people.)
At another point, I did see one face nodding at me blankly.
They say that remote working will be good for women. They say it will level the playing field. They say it will be more inclusive. But it won't be for me and others if I don't speak up now.
- Start with turning your camera on and encouraging others to do the same. I was recently in a two-person meeting. My camera was on, but the other person wouldn't turn theirs on. In that case, ten minutes in, I turned my camera off. You can't stare at my fuzzy eyebrows and my pile of laundry in the background if I can't do the same to you. When you have a willing participant, you'd be surprised by how helpful it can be to make actual eye contact with someone, even on a computer (and despite the fuzzy eyebrows).
- Use the chatbox. Enter in your questions. Enter in your comments. Dialogue back and forth. Type in a joke. I did that recently and someone entered back a laughing face — reaffirming that I was, indeed, funny.
- Designate a facilitator for the meeting: someone leading, coaching, and guiding. On my most recent call, a leader went around ensuring everyone was able to contribute fairly. She also ensured she asked for feedback on a specific topic and helped move the discussion around so no one person took up all the airtime.
- Unmute yourself. Please don't just sit there on mute for the entire meeting. Jump in and speak up. You will be interrupted. You will interrupt others. But don't get frustrated or discouraged — this is what work is now — just keep showing up and contributing.
- Smile, and smile big. Nod your head in agreement. Laugh. Give a thumbs up; give two! Wave. Make a heart with your hands. Signal to others on the call who are contributing that you support and value them. They will do the same in return when your turn comes to contribute.
It's too easy to keep your camera turned off. It's too easy to stay on mute. It's too easy to disappear. But now is not the time to disappear. Now is the time to stay engaged and networked within our organizations and communities.
So please don't put yourself on mute.
Well, actually, please do put yourself on mute so I don't have to hear your heavy breathing, candy bar crunching, or tinkling bathroom break.
But after that, please take yourself off mute so you can reclaim your seat (and your voice) at the table.