Today, like many days, is spent finishing up last minute things, in an attempt to ready my first brick and mortar store for its opening.
In the lead up to the launch, my days are crammed with paperwork: putting together our company employment strategy, overseeing the construction and design of our new store and charming my landlord.
These are all minor obstacles compared to the challenges I faced on the road to opening Harlem Chocolate Factory back in 2016. Growing up in Harlem, New York, I thought I was doing everything right when I went to college, but with an English degree and no direction, I ended up sleeping on an air mattress in my mother’s house with my two children.
I needed to go back to go forward. My love for sweets started as a child. Growing up, my mom was a health nut. We weren’t allowed to have any refined sugar in the house. To solve this, I made a deal with my mom - if I made the sweets myself, I could eat them. That’s how the journey into business started for me.
I always knew I wanted to start my own business, but without funding and little to no guidance I didn’t know how to get started. When I first learned about Accion, a non-profit lending company, I was working as a graphic designer to make money. I reached out to Accion about getting a loan. My loan officer said I was an ideal candidate for the Samuel Adams Brewing the American Dream program - a philanthropic program created by Samuel Adams’ founder and brewer, Jim Koch, to help support entrepreneurs in the food and beverage industry. And the rest is history so to speak.
Now, my company has grown from just me to a team of four with more on the way. I’m crafting the employee handbook, putting together the training program and developing the way we will convey our company culture. We have a solid base of followers and it seems like our opportunities are endless. Our demand is so high that we have people disappointed when they can’t buy our chocolate.
I always knew I wanted to start my own business, but without funding and little to no guidance I didn’t know how to get started.
While my business is in a great place, the path here wasn’t easy. Here are a few key lessons I learned along the way that played an important role in taking me from a chocolatier to successful business owner.
1. Focus on one thing and make it great
My mind has always worked in a million different directions. I’ve had hundreds of great ideas and it was difficult for me to focus on one idea and follow it through. After I graduated from college, I started looking into all these different industries, but I couldn’t find anything suited for me. My passion for making chocolate never wavered, but I didn’t think I could make enough money as a full-time chocolatier to support my family. Once I took the chance and committed to making Harlem Chocolate Factory a viable business, everything else fell into place.
2. Your business should be part of you
While creating the chocolate satisfied my adolescent sweet tooth, it wasn’t enough to start a business. I wanted to stand out. I wanted to speak to my history. I wanted to sell what I know. My resilience comes from growing up in Harlem, a predominantly black community that has been here for years and is rich in history.
Where I’m opening my store is in an area that once didn’t allow any African Americans to buy of the homes. Being able to move history forward in this way is empowering.
For me, the idea of this being my home and my culture is the foundation of Harlem Chocolate Factory. It’s about sharing the culture and experiences that I was raised on and the experiences that make Harlem more than a trend, but a community. I pull from that inspiration every day when creating chocolate. Everything from the recipes to packaging is a piece of Harlem’s culture. I embed as much of Harlem into my business, and into myself, as I can.
Jessica Spaulding gives us career envy
3. You don’t know what you don’t know
No one can predict the future, but you can arm yourself with knowledge. I took business classes, weeded out my ideas and learned to be nimble. I had problems focusing because I was always thinking of new ideas. Now I know that I don’t have time or money to waste. I’ve shifted my way of thinking to focus on what drives me. I do my best to prepare for whatever lies ahead.
4. Be resourceful
Before I officially started the business, I knew the first thing I was going to need was money. I found Accion and the Brewing the American Dream program through Sam Adams to help me launch. You should look for opportunities in your own community. If one option doesn’t work, explore another and do your research. Never take no for an answer.
When I participated in Sam Adams’ Pitch Room Competition in New York, I was able to pitch my business in front of successful entrepreneurs including Jim Koch, Chef David Burke and food magazine editors. It was a dream come true to have these influential entrepreneurs and writers taste my chocolate. What’s more, they gave me advice on how to structure my business and how to convey my story. This experience changed everything.
As a woman, I felt like I needed to take everyone’s advice. Some of it is discouraging and you can end up tearing yourself down every day. If you have advice for me, it should come with a plan
While I didn’t win the competition, I did receive a $2,800 Brewing the American Dream loan. With the loan, I purchased the materials I needed to get my business off the ground to start making the money I needed to steadily grow Harlem Chocolate Factory.
5. Use your mind not your money
Once I got the loan, I still had to be selective with how I spent the money. I knew I had to make my dollar stretch more than anyone else’s. I used my mind instead of throwing money at a problem. I have learned to adjust to challenges and think everything through before spending.
6. Convey the numbers
The best advice Jim Koch gave me was when he told me, “your story is beautiful, but you have to be able to convey the numbers.” His advice has stayed with me and will stay with me forever because building your business is you pitching it to people to get anything from funding to awareness, and you have to remember the numbers. It’s more than just having a great story. You have to prove that you understand the numbers and you’ve thought out how you’re going to take your business to the next level.
7. Advice without a plan is actually criticism
As a woman, I felt like I needed to take everyone’s advice. Some of it is discouraging and you can end up tearing yourself down every day. If you have advice for me, it should come with a plan. For example, if you tell me the door to my shop isn’t opening in the best way, and you think I should move the door so it can open it in a better way, that’s advice. Criticism is you just saying “I don’t like your door.” When you’re building a business, you’re on edge and one piece of criticism can knock you off your rocker. You need to learn to decipher advice from criticism. There were many times when I thought I was receiving advice, but it was criticism and not beneficial to my business or my journey. Being able to identify when you hear a piece of advice that will add value is key to moving forward. You also need to learn that it’s okay to tell people you’re not interested in their advice. Take what’s of value and execute.
It wasn’t easy, but starting Harlem Chocolate Company has been profoundly rewarding. I’ve been able to follow not only my passion for chocolate, but also impact my community and become part of Harlem’s history. This impact ultimately drives me and my business forward.
A woman at work, Spaulding is getting ready to open her first brick and mortar store
We are living in a time when women are rising to new heights which means they are regularly being confronted with the fear of being "too much". For women in business this is pervasive and costly.
A few ways women can be perceived as "too much" are:
Speaking up about their successes and achievements.
Sharing one too many photos of their cute kids.
Telling one too many people about that date night.
Looking a little too good in that swimsuit.
These can lead to being publicly attacked on social media or privately slandered which in turn leads to women dimming their light and walking on egg shells in hopes of avoiding conflict and judgement.
The minute a woman feels it's unsafe to shine she will begin to overthink, worry, and fear how she shows up in the world.
Forgetting to announce the book is done and the interview is live.
Choosing to focus on what's still on the to-do list rather than what's been checked off.
Many female entrepreneurs are subconsciously altering their behavior in an attempt to not attract too much attention to themselves, rather than focusing on allowing authenticity and magnetism to attract their ideal clients and community.
Women are afraid of being criticized, ostracized, and abandoned by other women for simply being who they are. This leads to quite the quantum when being who you are is simplest way to accelerate the growth of your business.
New research shows men are far more comfortable with self promotion than women are. Researchers found that men rate their own performance 33 percent higher than equally performing women. What we know is that self promotion pays off and this is where women are missing the boat.
The world needs more women to step into leadership roles and no longer be intimidated about creating six and seven figure careers.
Here are five ways to release the fear of being "too much":
1. Approve of yourself.
While it feels good to receive outside validation it will never be enough if you don't first appreciate yourself. The key to having a healthy support system is to make sure you are part of it. Being your biggest critic is what your mother's generation did. It's now time to be your biggest cheerleader. Becoming aware of self talk will reveal what belief is ready to be re-wired. Create a simply mantra that affirms how incredible capable you are.
2. Connect deeply to those you serve.
One powerful way to shift out of people pleasing behavior is to get clear on who actually matters to the wellbeing and success of your life and business. Leadership is not about being the most popular, instead it's a decision to be brave for those who can't be. Take a few minutes each day to visualize and meditate on those your business serves and supports. See your future clients moving toward you every time you choose to stand in your power and use your authentic voice.
3. Remember the legacy you wish to leave.
Having your life purpose and legacy in writing is one of the most transformational exercises you can do. Reading this often will keep you focused on what matters. Knowing what you wish to leave in the hearts of those you love most is incredibly grounding. You didn't come here to keep your mouth shut, dilute your truth, or dim your light-you came here to make a difference.
4. Forgive those who have been unsupportive in the past.
The past has a way of informing the future in a negative way when there is unresolved pain. Take a few minutes to get quiet and ask yourself who you have unforgiveness towards or maybe their name came to mind as you read this article. Listening to a forgiveness meditation or writing a letter to the person you are ready to forgive are both simple and effective ways to process and heal.
5. Be part a community of bright, successful women.
Meaningful relationships with others who have similar aspirations is what will keep you out of isolation and playing small. These connections can happen in a networking group, online community or a local Meetup. Thriving in every area of life is depend on you knowing where you belong and being celebrated there. Don't wait to be invited, go actively seek out people and places that support your dreams and desires.
6. Accept you can have it all.
Women have been fed a lie for generations that says, you can have love or money. Decide you can have it all and allow it to flow to you. You can have a successful career and an amazing mother. You can balance motherhood and loving marriage. Don't let anyone write the rules for you. This is the time to create the life you desire on your terms.
7. Celebrate everything!
The fastest way to leave the haters in the dust is to celebrate everything! At the end of each day lay in bed and recall the best moments. At the end of each week, publicly acknowledge and celebrate what's good in your life. Once a month, have a celebration dinner and share it with those who have helped you in the journey. If there's something good happening, talk about it with everyone who will listen!
May you be a woman who chooses to shine so that others may be reminded of all they can be and do.