4min readFinance 28 October 2019
Holistic wealth is about creating the circumstances in your life that allows you to be resilient and resourceful. I love these two words – because they embody what I want for all women – the ability to bounce back from life-altering setbacks and the ability to create and leverage resources to be financially independent. In my new book Holistic Wealth: 32 Life Lessons to Help You Find Purpose, Prosperity and Happiness, there's a whole section of the book filled with advice on how to achieve financial freedom.
Financial independence is one of the core concepts of living a holistically wealthy life. There are several strategies to get you to a place where you have enough income to pay your living expenses for the rest of your life without having to work full time. Whether this means retiring by the age of 40, or taking a more traditional route, building your financial portfolio depends on your financial identity. Here's an excerpt from the book:
A well-planned future also starts with developing your own financial identity. One way to do this is through financial literacy. Improving your financial literacy is also the greatest stimulant of wealth. Many of us make our first large purchase with a spouse or significant other. The first house, the first car, the wedding and honeymoon — these are all expenses tied to our expansionary years. We therefore transition into adulthood not having gained a full sense of our own personal financial identity. For instance, what is my investment identity? What are the things I will splurge on versus save on? This can also be tied to our values and mission in life. It is highly individual.
Each of us should have a financial identity — one that is distinct and separate from our spouse's or parents'. If you find yourself always wondering what your friends or parents think about the way you spend or invest, then it's an indication that you haven't fully figured out your financial identity. It's impossible to design a well-planned future without a proper financial identity—we end up living our lives in the footsteps of others—and possibly making the same money mistakes.
Holistic Wealth Book coverPhoto Courtesy of Keisha Blair
There are a few things you should be doing today that can help you rebound from setbacks in your future. Get a life insurance policy, plan for your retirement, and build an emergency fund, for starters. But your well-planned future also depends on developing your own financial identity. Here are five reasons why all women should develop their own financial identity:
It Relieves Worry and Stress
When you have your own financial identity you don't have to second guess every money move you make and you are confident that you are on the right track. Your own savings philosophy and investment philosophy that's tied to your personal values and mission is a key piece of becoming financially independent. It allows you to assess your goals and your money moves to ensure you're on the path to success.
It Leads to: A Life, Well Lived
This is the title to the opening chapter of my book. Its aptly named for the first chapter, because its hard to have a life well lived, without having your own financial identity. When your money and spending decisions are constantly influenced by someone else – your family and friends, a business partner you are on slippery turf. Not only does that railroad your dreams it puts your future in a precarious position.
It Fosters Taking Measured Risks
Taking measured risks is key to achieving a life, well-lived. It is important to take measured risks to achieve certain goals. For instance, the decision to buy that first home or investment property, or even starting that business you've always dreamed of, requires taking measured risks. Achieving your goals also rests on the realization that not taking measured risks, or simply not taking action at all, is detrimental to achieving holistic wealth. Yet in taking measured risks, we look for validation from others to do so. When we don't have a financial identity but look to the crowd for approval – then taking measured risks becomes less likely, and we bow to the pressure of doing what everyone else is doing – and not charting an individualized path forward.
It Allows for a Well-planned Future
Planning well means ensuring you have life insurance, adequate emergency savings to last for at least six months, and investments that can yield enough to enable financial resilience.
Everyone should have a good hold on their spending. Developing a budget and building an emergency fund is paramount. Make sure you have life insurance in place. Focus on addressing debt. After that develop a savings plan (both short and long term) and stick to it.
It Prevents A Never-Ending Cycle of Money Mistakes
When you haven't developed your own financial identity you risk making the same money mistakes over and over again. In addition, we end up living our lives in the footsteps of others—and possibly making the same money mistakes. We get stuck in two-step cycle: We make our own money mistakes repeatedly – like getting into unnecessary debt, accumulating things we don't need – and making the money mistakes others make – spending too much on entertainment or too many night out with friends.
In summary, having your own financial identity can save you from a lifetime of disappointment and frustration. It can make the difference between having a fulfilling happy life and constantly living in fear and anxiety about money issues. Most important of all, it can enable you to be financially resilient, and better able to weather the inevitable storms and setbacks that life brings.
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We are living in a time when women are rising to new heights which means they are regularly being confronted with the fear of being "too much". For women in business this is pervasive and costly.
A few ways women can be perceived as "too much" are:
Speaking up about their successes and achievements.
Sharing one too many photos of their cute kids.
Telling one too many people about that date night.
Looking a little too good in that swimsuit.
These can lead to being publicly attacked on social media or privately slandered which in turn leads to women dimming their light and walking on egg shells in hopes of avoiding conflict and judgement.
The minute a woman feels it's unsafe to shine she will begin to overthink, worry, and fear how she shows up in the world.
Forgetting to announce the book is done and the interview is live.
Choosing to focus on what's still on the to-do list rather than what's been checked off.
Many female entrepreneurs are subconsciously altering their behavior in an attempt to not attract too much attention to themselves, rather than focusing on allowing authenticity and magnetism to attract their ideal clients and community.
Women are afraid of being criticized, ostracized, and abandoned by other women for simply being who they are. This leads to quite the quantum when being who you are is simplest way to accelerate the growth of your business.
New research shows men are far more comfortable with self promotion than women are. Researchers found that men rate their own performance 33 percent higher than equally performing women. What we know is that self promotion pays off and this is where women are missing the boat.
The world needs more women to step into leadership roles and no longer be intimidated about creating six and seven figure careers.
Here are five ways to release the fear of being "too much":
1. Approve of yourself.
While it feels good to receive outside validation it will never be enough if you don't first appreciate yourself. The key to having a healthy support system is to make sure you are part of it. Being your biggest critic is what your mother's generation did. It's now time to be your biggest cheerleader. Becoming aware of self talk will reveal what belief is ready to be re-wired. Create a simply mantra that affirms how incredible capable you are.
2. Connect deeply to those you serve.
One powerful way to shift out of people pleasing behavior is to get clear on who actually matters to the wellbeing and success of your life and business. Leadership is not about being the most popular, instead it's a decision to be brave for those who can't be. Take a few minutes each day to visualize and meditate on those your business serves and supports. See your future clients moving toward you every time you choose to stand in your power and use your authentic voice.
3. Remember the legacy you wish to leave.
Having your life purpose and legacy in writing is one of the most transformational exercises you can do. Reading this often will keep you focused on what matters. Knowing what you wish to leave in the hearts of those you love most is incredibly grounding. You didn't come here to keep your mouth shut, dilute your truth, or dim your light-you came here to make a difference.
4. Forgive those who have been unsupportive in the past.
The past has a way of informing the future in a negative way when there is unresolved pain. Take a few minutes to get quiet and ask yourself who you have unforgiveness towards or maybe their name came to mind as you read this article. Listening to a forgiveness meditation or writing a letter to the person you are ready to forgive are both simple and effective ways to process and heal.
5. Be part a community of bright, successful women.
Meaningful relationships with others who have similar aspirations is what will keep you out of isolation and playing small. These connections can happen in a networking group, online community or a local Meetup. Thriving in every area of life is depend on you knowing where you belong and being celebrated there. Don't wait to be invited, go actively seek out people and places that support your dreams and desires.
6. Accept you can have it all.
Women have been fed a lie for generations that says, you can have love or money. Decide you can have it all and allow it to flow to you. You can have a successful career and an amazing mother. You can balance motherhood and loving marriage. Don't let anyone write the rules for you. This is the time to create the life you desire on your terms.
7. Celebrate everything!
The fastest way to leave the haters in the dust is to celebrate everything! At the end of each day lay in bed and recall the best moments. At the end of each week, publicly acknowledge and celebrate what's good in your life. Once a month, have a celebration dinner and share it with those who have helped you in the journey. If there's something good happening, talk about it with everyone who will listen!
May you be a woman who chooses to shine so that others may be reminded of all they can be and do.