People 01 April 2018
Leaving everything behind in India and landing in the United States with only two suitcases and $20 to your name, isn't a story that many people are able to tell. After speaking with Urvashi Pitre who lived that experience and has risen to create so many positive things in her life and a thriving cookbook empire, I can honestly say that it's a story filled with compassion, bravery and fueled by the want to help others.
At 20-year-old, Pitre arrived in the United States to fulfill a scholarship and even became CMIO of the largest ad agency in the country, but that is only where her story begins. To me, this remarkable feat sounds overwhelming, but she assured me that it wasn't. “You would think it would have been—but at 20 years old, you think you're invincible, “ she said. "I did have the promise of a scholarship, but I really had no idea if it would be enough to live on, when it would kick in, and more importantly—what I would do until it came through!"
Instead, she focused on the positive. “But I will say, then and now, I focused on what I did have," she remarks. "I had a great new opportunity ahead of me. I had the chance to start from scratch, to do what I wanted to do, to live on my own terms."
To know I could make it on my own, with no help from my family. Looking back, I seem to remember moments of great excitement and a sense of adventure—sparkled with occasional moments of sheer terror—but isn't that the hallmark of every great adventure?
"Influenced by spices from her world travels, she created extremely unique keto recipes that helped her lose 80 pounds." Photo Courtesy of Norwalk Reflector
Her biggest struggle? Navigating the everyday things that she wasn't accustomed to where she grew up. “It was less about steps toward a better life at first as it was just being able to negotiate simple things. I had never seen a can of Coke®. When I was handed one on a hot day, I had no idea how to open it! I hadn't seen a seatbelt in a car. I had no idea what a garbage disposal was or how to work a dishwasher, a washing machine, or a vacuum cleaner. All of this was 30 years ago when not only were these things not common in India, but we also didn't have the easy access information about life in the US that we do today."
“People think that most of us come here for a better life—and we do, or at least for a different life. But we also must learn to do things for ourselves we've never done before, things that were done for us in countries where labor is a lot cheaper than it is here. I had not washed dishes, done the laundry, cleaned the house or even picked up after myself until I came to live here. I was in for quite a rude awakening in that regard!"
Struggling for years with her weight, she eventually started the ketogenic diet (a high fat, moderate protein, low carbohydrate lifestyle) and started documenting her journey through her blog, Two Sleevers. Like any smart woman, she took the skills that she learned from her advertising agency experience an applied them to her business. “I learned a lot about how to deal with the C-suite, how to present your company well, how to go out and find new business, how to partner with different agencies, each with their own specialties. But it's sort of like watching your parents—you also learn what you don't want to do when you're all grown up. I used that experience to help me decide what I would and would not do in my own company. For example, I decided I would not work with clients who were disrespectful, or who treated my staff badly. I would be selective about who I chose to partner with. I would stay involved in the day to day of the client work in a way that I could not be, as part of a larger company. Tasseologic has allowed me to create the type of company that I would have wanted to work at—and I'm so grateful to have had that opportunity."
Influenced by spices from her world travels, she created extremely unique keto recipes that helped her lose 80 pounds. Gaining the nickname, “The Butter Chicken Lady," she has created an online voice that has appealed to many (including her 25,000 Facebook group members) and is on her way to publish her second cookbook called The Keto Instant Pot Cookbook. Following a ketogenic diet myself, I'm in awe of the community she's built and love how her and her family has made her journey a group effort. The keto diet and instant pot have become two major things her life, which she was first introduced to after her husband had gastric sleeve surgery, as a way to change both of their lives and the way they were eating, forever.
"At 20-year-old, Pitre arrived in the United States to fulfill a scholarship and even became CMIO of the largest ad agency in the country, but that is only where her story begins." Photo Courtesy of Urvashi Pitre
“You can cut out most of your stomach and reboot your body chemistry—but if you're carb-sensitive like we were, and you don't cut out the carbs? Well, you'll gain all the weight back over time. So keto/low carb is not optional for me. It's what I have to do to keep off the weight I worked so hard to lose."
And the ease of the instant post made things so much better, too. “I bought an Instant Pot over 4 years ago, and the ease of electric pressure cookers over stovetop ones just appeal to someone like me, who loves hands off, stupid simple cooking that still manages to taste great," she shared.
Pitre has two crucial pieces of advice for anyone trying to lose weight, and keep it off, “first, with weight loss as with other things in life, you control your actions, not the outcome. Accept that you do not control what the scale tells you from day to day. You can only control what you put into your mouth. You can't control the rate of weight loss. Secondly, you will be “stalled" more days than you will show weight loss. In other words, you will lose weight here and here—but for most days, your scale will not budge. You cannot expect to see daily change. Focus on the trend and the trajectory—not on any given day or week or even two weeks. If you see an overall loss, you're doing fine." And my personal favorite bit of wisdom is that she always says to, “focus on what you can have. Don't fixate on the things you're giving up or can't eat. There's no can't, it's a choice you're making. You choose not to have things that will make you fat and uncomfortable. Speaking of choice, rejoice in the fact that you choose to eat so many delicious things, and yet lose weight. Focus on what you can have. It's a lot more fun."
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Help! My Friend Is a No Show
Dear Armchair Psychologist,
I have a friend who doesn't reply to my messages about meeting for dinner, etc. Although, last week I ran into her at a local restaurant of mine, it has always been awkward to be friends with her. Should I continue our friendship or discontinue it? We've been friends for a total four years and nothing has changed. I don't feel as comfortable with her as my other close friends, and I don't think I'll ever be able to reach that comfort zone in pure friendship.
Dear Sadsies,I am sorry to hear you've been neglected by your friend. You may already have the answer to your question, since you're evaluating the non-existing bond between yourself and your friend. However, I'll gladly affirm to you that a friendship that isn't reciprocated is not a good friendship.
I have had a similar situation with a friend whom I'd grown up with but who was also consistently a very negative person, a true Debby Downer. One day, I just had enough of her criticism and vitriol. I stopped making excuses for her and dumped her. It was a great decision and I haven't looked back. With that in mind, it could be possible that something has changed in your friend's life, but it's insignificant if she isn't responding to you. It's time to dump her and spend your energy where it's appreciated. Don't dwell on this friend. History is not enough to create a lasting bond, it only means just that—you and your friend have history—so let her be history!
- The Armchair Psychologist