I'm Farra, a mom in her early thirties, with three babies under three, and wife to a man-child whose real age is 30. I have a two-year-old daughter Quinn, and two six-month-old twin girls, Blake and Logan. I got into using essential oils around a year ago, after a friend raved about them on social media. When I finally decided to dive in, I wasn't entirely sold on anything – I just thought that the diffuser was pretty and figured it couldn't hurt to try natural ways to de-stress and relax. I had recently lost my dad and was reeling from that, in addition to being pregnant with the twins. I was hoping that aromatherapy might take the edge off my whirlwind of emotions.
Farra Rogers and her family
To be totally honest, I was pretty skeptical about oils actually "working.” I mean, I'm a nurse who wholeheartedly believes in modern medicine and for some wacky reason, I, along with many other people generally assume that you have to believe in either traditional or alternative medicine. Modern medicine is absolutely amazing and before it's existence, lots of people died who probably didn't have to. But guess what I have come to find out? It's also amazing that we can support our bodies with stuff that is not formulated in a lab but grown from the earth, like plant juice. And if we support our bodies to work in the way they are meant to, we will generally feel better (less stressed, more rested, happier, and healthier).
So, it turns out, it's not a hard line in the sand; yes, you can choose to support your body naturally and also be grateful for the availability of medicine when it is needed. Anyway, I got my premium starter kit, which I bought knowing I wanted to get rid of my beloved candles (most are really not healthy to burn in your home) and I still wanted my home to smell nice and have a relaxing effect.
I started diffusing and applying the oils topically, and began realizing these things were actually working. My toddler was sleeping, I was feeling less stressed as a grieving, pregnant, unable-to-drink-a-beer mom of a toddler, they were helping with pregnancy annoyances that I refused to take pills for, and even my husband was requesting them. In a nutshell, I loved the oils right away and I wanted all of them.
When I look back now, I realize that getting this little kit was life-changing, but, I didn't know that then. From checking out the oils Facebook groups that I was added to with my kit purchase, I started realizing that most of us are fed a lot of bullshit by means of advertising when it comes to buying products. Do you know that tons of items, even those specifically formulated "for" babies, are full of toxic ingredients! Did you know that companies can list "fragrance" as an ingredient and that this can include like, anything, including known carcinogenic garbage?! Some moms were mentioning this little app called Think Dirty so I had to check it out. Trust me, once you learn about the ingredients in your beloved products, you will think twice about everything you buy. When my first was born, I thought I knew what was best. I wanted everything to be specifically for “baby”- special detergent and body washes and sunscreen, etc. I figured, if I'm buying X product for $16,99 at a store, it must be safe and it must be better than the cheap stuff. Wrong.
I slowly started to learn that many of the products that I had been using for years were packed with chemicals and just flat out bad for human beings, not to mention even worse for tiny babies and vulnerable pregnant bodies. It's pretty infuriating to me, that as a seriously busy mom of three, I can't just sprint through the store and throw baby-labeled products in my cart. No, I have to carefully inspect the ingredients because for some reason it's legal to include hormone-disruptors (seriously?! I have three beautiful baby girls and I don't want their hormones effed with) and carcinogens in these things we need.
Luckily, I found out that I could make tons of stuff with my oils and a few other basic ingredients, so I started doing that. Slowly but surely, I also started replacing all of my other goods with Young Living oils- baby products, house cleaner, detergent, dish soap, hand soap, etc. I can read the ingredient list and when I look them up, I don't find scary as-shit-health impacts like "hormone disruptor" or "immunotoxicity.” Who knows what kind of long term effects the toxins found in most household name-brand products have on our bodies, but I don't want to chance it.
I want to grow really old and wrinkly with my husband. I don't want my daughters to feel the awful pain of losing me too soon. I want to feel good and run around with my kids and grandkids till I'm 90. I want my girls to be happy and healthy and carefree for as long as possible. And if clearing out the toxic crap we put on and in our bodies can influence this, I'm all in!
For me, this journey started with a starter kit from Young Living. And I am so grateful for that. I want the same for all my friends, family and even the strangers I meet in Starbucks. Sharing about Young Living products came naturally to me because I feel so safe using it on myself and my precious babies. If you’re interested in learning more about my wellness journey, please feel free to reach out!
The 11 Oils Essential To Your Well-being
- Lemon - Use it for cleaning, detoxing, and flavoring your water.
- Digize - Great for supporting all types of tummy troubles.
- Copaiba - Works as an oil magnifier and for muscle support
- Peppermint - Muscle discomfort support, relieves occasional head discomfort, and clears your head.
- Thieves - Supports immunity and purifies the air.
- Frankincense - Calming, great for meditation, skin support, and good enough for baby Jesus.
- Purification - Use for clear skin, outdoor annoyances, and anything stanky.
- Pan away - Keep your joints and muscles happy.
- RC - Use it to breathe easy and for the side effects of germ season.
- Lavender - Great for sleep, skin, and basically everything else.
- Stress Away - Because drinking before noon isn’t always acceptable!
Women in the workplace have always experienced a certain degree of discrimination from male colleagues, and according to new studies, it appears that it is becoming even more difficult for women to get acclimated to modern day work environments, in wake of the #MeToo Movement.
In a recent study conducted by LeanIn.org, in partnership with SurveyMonkey, 60% of male managers confessed to feeling uncomfortable engaging in social situations with women in and outside of the workplace. This includes interactions such as mentorships, meetings, and basic work activities. This statistic comes as a shocking 32% rise from 2018.
What appears the be the crux of the matter is that men are afraid of being accused of sexual harassment. While it is impossible to discredit this fear as incidents of wrongful accusations have taken place, the extent to which it has burgeoned is unacceptable. The #MeToo movement was never a movement against men, but an empowering opportunity for women to speak up about their experiences as victims of sexual harassment. Not only were women supporting one another in sharing to the public that these incidents do occur, and are often swept under the rug, but offered men insight into behaviors and conversations that are typically deemed unwelcomed and unwarranted.
Restricting interaction with women in the workplace is not a solution, but a mere attempt at deflecting from the core issue. Resorting to isolation and exclusion relays the message that if men can't treat women how they want, then they rather not deal with them at all. Educating both men and women on what behaviors are unacceptable while also creating a work environment where men and women are held accountable for their actions would be the ideal scenario. However, the impact of denying women opportunities of mentorship and productive one-on-one meetings hinders growth within their careers and professional networks.
Women, particularly women of color, have always had far fewer opportunities for mentorship which makes it impossible to achieve growth within their careers without them. If women are given limited opportunities to network in and outside of a work environment, then men must limit those opportunities amongst each other, as well. At the most basic level, men should be approaching female colleagues as they would approach their male colleagues. Striving to achieve gender equality within the workplace is essential towards creating a safer environment.
While restricted communication and interaction may diminish the possibility of men being wrongfully accused of sexual harassment, it creates a hostile
environment that perpetuates women-shaming and victim-blaming. Creating distance between men and women only prompts women to believe that male colleagues who avoid them will look away from or entirely discredit sexual harassment they experience from other men in the workplace. This creates an unsafe working environment for both parties where the problem at hand is not solved, but overlooked.
According to LeanIn's study, only 85% of women said they feel safe on the job, a 5% drop from 2018. In the report, Jillesa Gebhardt wrote, "Media coverage that is intended to hold aggressors accountable also seems to create a sense of threat, and people don't seem to feel like aggressors are held accountable." Unfortunately, only 16% of workers believed that harassers holding high positions are held accountable for their actions which inevitably puts victims in difficult, and quite possibly dangerous, situations. 50% of workers also believe that there are more repercussions for the victims than harassers when speaking up.
In a research poll conducted by Edison Research in 2018, 30% of women agreed that their employers did not handle harassment situations properly while 53% percent of men agreed that they did. Often times, male harassers hold a significant amount of power within their careers that gives them a sense of security and freedom to go forward with sexual misconduct. This can be seen in cases such as that of Harvey Weinstein, Bill Cosby and R. Kelly. Men in power seemingly have little to no fear that they will face punishment for their actions.
Source-Alex Brandon, AP
Sheryl Sandberg, Facebook executive and founder of LeanIn.org., believes that in order for there to be positive changes within work environments, more women should be in higher positions. In an interview with CNBC's Julia Boorstin, Sandberg stated, "you know where the least sexual harassment is? Organizations that have more women in senior leadership roles. And so, we need to mentor women, we need to sponsor women, we need to have one-on-one conversations with them that get them promoted." Fortunately, the number of women in leadership positions are slowly increasing which means the prospect of gender equality and safer work environments are looking up.
Despite these concerning statistics, Sandberg does not believe that movements such as the Times Up and Me Too movements, have been responsible for the hardship women have been experiencing in the workplace. "I don't believe they've had negative implications. I believe they're overwhelmingly positive. Because half of women have been sexually harassed. But the thing is it is not enough. It is really important not to harass anyone. But that's pretty basic. We also need to not be ignored," she stated. While men may be feeling uncomfortable, putting an unrealistic amount of distance between themselves and female coworkers is more harmful to all parties than it is beneficial. Men cannot avoid working with women and vice versa. Creating such a hostile environment is also detrimental to any business as productivity and communication will significantly decrease.
The fear or being wrongfully accused of sexual harassment is a legitimate fear that deserves recognition and understanding. However, restricting interactions with women in the workplace is not a sensible solution as it can have negatively impact a woman's career. Companies are in need of proper training and resources to help both men and women understand what is appropriate workplace behavior. Refraining from physical interactions, commenting on physical appearance, making lewd or sexist jokes and inquiring about personal information are also beneficial steps towards respecting your colleagues' personal space. There is still much work to be done in order to create safe work environments, but with more and more women speaking up and taking on higher positions, women can feel safer and hopefully have less contributions to make to the #MeToo movement.