There is encouraging evidence that shows that greater numbers of women are participating in traditionally male-dominated sports such as rugby and MMA. This seems to suggest that some of the long-standing ideas regarding women's capability to compete in these spheres are gradually weakening, and that women seeking to enter these sports face fewer barriers and less discrimination than they previously did. Sports have the ability to empower, so increased female participation is something that must be understood as positive progress and a move away from the macho attitudes normally associated with sports, to something more inclusive and egalitarian.
Perhaps one of the most striking examples of women penetrating into and becoming incredibly successful in a field that for a long time was dominated by men is the rise of women in MMA. Fighters such as Justine "Cyborg" Justino, Meisha Tate and Joanna Jedrzejczyk have become genuinely popular among fans of the sport, and women's MMA bouts are now highly-anticipated affairs, demonstrating how much progress women have made since 2011 when UFC president Dana White claimed that women would never compete in the UFC.
The woman who changed this was Rhonda Rousey, who made her UFC debut in 2013 and was the first women's champion in the competition. She has since been overtaken by the likes of Holly Holm and Amanda Nunes, but Rousey opened a lot of doors to women when she was in her prime. She helped to challenge patriarchal notions regarding women's place in MMA, forced fans and pundits to take female fighters seriously as professional martial artists, and raised the profile of women's MMA. The current state of women's MMA and the high calibre of fighters breaking through is, in part, Ronda Rousey's legacy.
Photo by Jdcollins13 // CC BY 2.0
Caption: Ronda Rousey was the first UFC women's champion
Despite being one of the most popular sports in the world, field hockey is very rarely televised and its star players lack the household-name status enjoyed by athletes in other sports. This may well be due to the fact that many people do not take the sport seriously, probably due to its identity as a sport played mainly by women and girls. One woman, however, that may have a legitimate claim to being a true field hockey celebrity is Fatima de Moreira de Melo, former Dutch international and Olympic gold medallist. Her profile has risen dramatically since entering the world of professional poker.
One particularly interesting aspect to this professional poker player's story is that she crossed over from field hockey, a sport long considered to be a firmly feminine pursuit, and as such one that is quite often looked down upon by male sports fans. The former field hockey star from The Netherlands has been playing big stakes poker since 2009 and has amassed an impressive total earnings of over $500,000.
The rising popularity in women's rugby is also noteworthy. There has been a concerted effort on the part of rugby's governing bodies to reconstruct the sport's identity and effect changes in popular conceptions of the quality of women's rugby. Campaigns such as "Try and Stop Us" are effective in their attempts to narrow gender imbalances in rugby and to remove barriers to participation. There is statistical evidence to show that these efforts are bearing fruit, with figures showing increasing numbers of women and girls are getting into the sport. This seems to be part of a general trend which shows that sports are becoming more inclusive, although sports traditionally perceived as inherently 'masculine' still lag behind sports like golf and tennis, which are some of the most equitable on the planet in terms of equal participation between men and women.
Women such as Ronda Rousey and Fatima Moreira de Melo have done great things in the drive to widen participation and to question prevailing attitudes regarding women in sport. Their success in their respective fields should, hopefully, motivate and inspire women and girls to redefine the boundaries of their potential and to become more confident in their ambitions to excel. And, from the way things are going, it looks as though they are.
"Who are you meeting for lunch this week?"
Without fail, my former boss would ask me this question in every weekly status we had. And I dreaded the question. Because my answer was generally a stammering "Umm… No One." Occasionally I could remember what I actually had for lunch. And almost always it was sitting in my windowless cube eating a soggy sad sandwich.
I didn't understand why "who I had lunch with this week" was worthy of being a topic on our weekly status. After all, I was only 6 months into this new job. I was still figuring out how to pull data from Nielsen. I was still figuring out how to write an innovation brief. I was still trying to figure out where the bathrooms were in this maze of a building.
And despite knowing this question would come up in every weekly status, I was reluctant to change my behavior. I didn't see the value in the question. I didn't see the importance of it in my career. I didn't understand why I had to have lunch with anyone.
Because I hated the idea of having to network, to meet people, to put myself out there. Because networking was something slimy and strange and weird and scary. It made my stomach hurt, my throat go dry. And I could feel a faint headache coming on.
Even Oxford's definition of networking only reaffirmed my fears of what networking looked like: the action or process of interacting with others to exchange information and develop professional or social contacts.
Because please don't ask me to walk into a room where I don't know anyone. And stand in the corner sipping a bad glass of Chardonnay. Please don't ask me to slide my business card out and not so subtly shove it in your face. And ask you to do something for me. Please don't ask me to network. Because I hate networking.
And I used to hate networking (okay, maybe hate is too strong.) I still really dislike the term. "Networking" seemed about getting something from someone. Or someone getting something from you. A favor, a job, a referral. "Networking" seemed very transactional. And someone shoving a business card at you (which happened to me recently at event) only solidified by feelings.
And over the years, I came to really understand that networking wasn't about "the action or process of interacting with others." It was about building authentic connections. It was about meeting people who were different than you. It was about expanding my community. And creating new communities. It was tapping into more and more communities I could belong to.
And as I slowly started to change my view on networking- I mean building authentic connections- I started to realize my communities were more inclusive than I thought. My best friends from middle school. Former bosses. College Alumni I met after we had graduated. Colleagues from past companies. Vendors and agency partners I had once worked with. Colleagues I had once managed. As my family expanded, my husband, my two sister-in laws and my brother in-law. A whole host of fabulous cousin-in-laws. My baby brother as his career skyrocketed. And fellow parents in my kids' school.
I still hate networking. And I love building connections. And helping to build connections and be a bridge for other people.
Now, when I go to a large event, I try to go with a friend. We have a drink at the bar and then part ways to try and make new friends. If we don't authentically connect with other people, and we have made the effort, we always have each other to back to.
Now, I try to meet one new person a week at my company or in my broader community, or reconnect with someone I miss seeing. (This doesn't always have to be in person, can be text, Zoom or Facetime.) And if you can't commit to doing that, that you should seriously relook at your schedule. I thank my former boss for that constant reminder.
Now, I joined Luminary, a women's collaboration hub in NYC, which has been life changing for me. I am also on the advisory board. It's all about women supporting and lifting each other up- to get more money, get that next big promotion, or start their own venture. It's a built-in community of unwavering support.
Now, I am working on expanding my community of moms. Not too long ago, I worked up the nerve to ask a fellow mom in my daughter's class if she wanted to get together. She thought I meant a playdate. I meant drinks. And after one late night out drinking, I have bonded with a whole new set of badass women.
And all of these communities. I am there for my communities. And they are all there for me. Referral for a job at my company. Coaching on how to survive a bad boss. Advice on how to ask for more money. Supporting each other as we care for aging parents. Candid feedback on why they didn't get that promotion. Commiserating over a cocktail on which working parent had the worst week ever.
So please don't ask me to network. Because I hate it. And well actually I don't have a business card to give you. I haven't printed one in four years.