Have you been dating casually for some time now? Maybe, it is the best time to move this relationship to another level. But wait! Probably, it is not yet time. So, how do you know if all is ready? There are signs and factors to consider before taking this sensitive step. In many cases, this entirely depends on the people involved and how they view such things in life. For now, let us dive into these insights.
Be Sure That This Is What You Want
Before making the step from casual dating to a relationship, you need to understand whether this is what you really want in life. Many people have jumped to the other side, only to realize that they are not ready for commitments. The good thing is that your heart will always let you know whether you are ready or not. So, you must listen to it carefully.
Have You Set Relationship Goals?
Moving casual dating to the next level is not as simple as many people think. It requires preparation. The first thing to do is set the relationship goals and expectations. To make it even simpler, categorize them into short- and long-term goals. As a starting point, it will help to know whether both of you are ready for the next step or not. Most people will move forward once they have established the goals that they would like to fulfill.
Understand the Weight of a Relationship
Unlike casual dating, serious relationships come with a plethora of needs and commitments. There will also be some rules to guide both of you and ensure that you are both happy. Unless people understand what all this means, they are not ready to move to the next step. According to the experts, this is the time to talk to friends and relatives who are already in relationships. Better still, an expert will offer some helpful guidance.
What Does Your Partner Think About It?
After engaging in a casual relationship for some time now, you can tell whether it is a good thing or not. The casual dating rules and commitments might be great so far, but you have a desire to move into something serious. But does your partner have the same desire as you? Instead of asking directly, you can start by being aware of how she or he views you. Pay attention to every meeting that both of you have and even show commitment to the casual relationship.
It is also at this point that you must look at the red flags that will lead to problems when things are escalated to the next level. Having doubt is a good thing because it helps you to see the whole picture clearly. Otherwise, we are all aware that our own relationship desires can make us overlook some important things.
Are There Feelings Involved?
Casual dating, according to many people, hardly involves any feelings between the two parties. It is a form of agreement that both parties will make each other happy. But in many cases, feelings of love may develop. If your relationship has moved in this direction, you might be lucky because this means that you can move from casual dating to a relationship. The feelings have to come from both partners for it to work. Feelings of love are strong, and people can hardly resist them when they are formed. Today, either party can break the ice and propose to move to the next level.
Do You Have the Resources?
A relationship has expectations that must be fulfilled. For this to happen, resources are required. The main ones include time and money. If you are too engaged in other things like a career, education or family, then you are not ready to take casual dating to the next level. On the other hand, you need money to contribute to bills when you go out, buy your partner gifts and even surprise her or him with a holiday. As we all know, lives move because there is money to buy goods and services. So, if these two resources are available, then you can consider yourself ready.
Test the Waters
Even after looking at all factors and ascertaining that it is the right time to move from casual dating to a relationship, it is not wise to jump into it immediately. Test the waters to learn whether it will really work or not. Start acting as if you are already in a relationship but be cautious not to blow things out of proportion. If there is a positive response, then you can pop the big question.
Moving from casual dating to a relationship is a big step in the lives of many people. And making a mistake in this can be costly. Therefore, everyone should be very careful when making this move.
Personally, I am over the top excited that we are on the cusp of turning the page on not only a new year but also on a new 10-year window of opportunities and possibilities!
You may be thinking, whoa…I am just embracing the fall season…yikes… it is tough to think about a new decade!
Yet it is this groundwork, this forward thought that you put in place TODAY that will propel you and lead you into greatness in 2020 and beyond. Designing a new decade rests in your ability to vision, in your willingness to be curious, in your awareness of where you are now and what you most want to curate. Essentially, curating what's next is about tapping into today with confidence, conviction, and decision. Leading YOU starts now. This is your new next. It is your choice.
Sometimes to get to that 'next', you need to take a step back to reflect. Please pardon my asking you to spend time in yesterday. Those who know me personally, know that I created and continue to grow my business based on enabling the present moment as a springboard for living your legacy. So, indulge me here! True, I am asking you to peek into the past, yet it is only in order for you to bring the essence of that past forward into this moment called NOW.
One of the best ways to tap into what's next is to clarify what drives you. To design a new decade, ask yourself this question about the past ten years:
What worked? What were my successes?
Make a list of your achievements big and small. Don't type them, but rather use ink and paper and sit with and savor them. Move your thoughts and your successes from your head, to your heart, to your pen, to the paper. Remember that on the flip side of goals not attained and New Year's resolutions abandoned, there was more than likely some traction and action that moved you forward, even if the end result was not what you expected. Once you have a full list of a decade's worth of personal and professional accomplishments, think about how this makes you feel. Do you remember celebrating all of them? My guess is no. So, celebrate them now. Give them new life by validating them. Circle the successes that resonate with you most right now. Where can you lean into those accomplishments as you power into the decade ahead?
Now comes a tougher question, one that I used myself in my own mid-life reinvention and a question I adore because in a moment's time it provides you with a quick reconnect to your unique inner voice.
If it were 10 years ago and nothing were standing in your way, no fear or excuses to contend with…what would you do?
Don't overthink it. The brilliance of this question is that it refocuses purpose. Whatever first came to mind when you answered this for yourself is at its core a powerful insight into defining and redefining the FUTURE decade. Bring your answer into the light of today and what small piece of it is actionable NOW? Where is this resonating and aligning with a 2019 version of yourself?
Then, based on your success list and your answer to the above question, what is your 2020 vision for your business and for the business of YOU?
Designing a new decade begins as a collection of 3,650 opportunities. 3,650 blank slates of new days ahead in which to pivot and propel yourself forward. Every single one of those days is a window into your legacy. An invitation to be, create, explore, and chip away at this thing we call life. One 24-hour segment at a time.
While you have a decade ahead to work on design improvements, you have the ability to begin manifesting this project of YOU Version 2020 right NOW. Based on exploring the exercises in this post, begin executing your vision. Ask questions. Be present. Let go of 2019 and the past 10 years so that you can embrace the next 10. Position acceptance and self-trust at the forefront of how you lead you. One choice at a time.
Don't get bogged down in the concept of the next 10 years. Instead position clarity and intention into each new day, starting today. Then chase every one of those intentions with an in-the-moment commitment and solution toward living a legendary life!