Have you been dating casually for some time now? Maybe, it is the best time to move this relationship to another level. But wait! Probably, it is not yet time. So, how do you know if all is ready? There are signs and factors to consider before taking this sensitive step. In many cases, this entirely depends on the people involved and how they view such things in life. For now, let us dive into these insights.
Be Sure That This Is What You Want
Before making the step from casual dating to a relationship, you need to understand whether this is what you really want in life. Many people have jumped to the other side, only to realize that they are not ready for commitments. Maybe you are just about to jump into one of a thousand hookup websites like Naughtydate looking for a good and fun time? The good thing is that your heart will always let you know whether you are ready or not. So, you must listen to it carefully.
Have You Set Relationship Goals?
Moving casual dating to the next level is not as simple as many people think. It requires preparation. The first thing to do is set the relationship goals and expectations. To make it even simpler, categorize them into short- and long-term goals. As a starting point, it will help to know whether both of you are ready for the next step or not. Most people will move forward once they have established the goals that they would like to fulfill.
Understand the Weight of a Relationship
Unlike casual dating, serious relationships come with a plethora of needs and commitments. There will also be some rules to guide both of you and ensure that you are both happy. Unless people understand what all this means, they are not ready to move to the next step. According to the experts, this is the time to talk to friends and relatives who are already in relationships. Better still, an expert will offer some helpful guidance.
What Does Your Partner Think About It?
After engaging in a casual relationship for some time now, you can tell whether it is a good thing or not. You can see here about casual dating rules and commitments might be great so far, but you have a desire to move into something serious. But does your partner have the same desire as you? Instead of asking directly, you can start by being aware of how she or he views you. Pay attention to every meeting that both of you have and even show commitment to the casual relationship.
It is also at this point that you must look at the red flags that will lead to problems when things are escalated to the next level. Having doubt is a good thing because it helps you to see the whole picture clearly. Otherwise, we are all aware that our own relationship desires can make us overlook some important things.
Are There Feelings Involved?
Casual dating, according to many people, hardly involves any feelings between the two parties. It is a form of agreement that both parties will make each other happy. But in many cases, feelings of love may develop. If your relationship has moved in this direction, you might be lucky because this means that you can move from casual dating to a relationship. The feelings have to come from both partners for it to work. Feelings of love are strong, and people can hardly resist them when they are formed. Today, either party can break the ice and propose to move to the next level.
Do You Have the Resources?
A relationship has expectations that must be fulfilled. For this to happen, resources are required. The main ones include time and money. If you are too engaged in other things like a career, education or family, then you are not ready to take casual dating to the next level. On the other hand, you need money to contribute to bills when you go out, buy your partner gifts and even surprise her or him with a holiday. As we all know, lives move because there is money to buy goods and services. So, if these two resources are available, then you can consider yourself ready.
Test the Waters
Even after looking at all factors and ascertaining that it is the right time to move from casual dating to a relationship, it is not wise to jump into it immediately. Test the waters to learn whether it will really work or not. Start acting as if you are already in a relationship but be cautious not to blow things out of proportion. If there is a positive response, then you can pop the big question.
Moving from casual dating to a relationship is a big step in the lives of many people. And making a mistake in this can be costly. Therefore, everyone should be very careful when making this move.
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Help! My Friend Is a No Show
Dear Armchair Psychologist,
I have a friend who doesn't reply to my messages about meeting for dinner, etc. Although, last week I ran into her at a local restaurant of mine, it has always been awkward to be friends with her. Should I continue our friendship or discontinue it? We've been friends for a total four years and nothing has changed. I don't feel as comfortable with her as my other close friends, and I don't think I'll ever be able to reach that comfort zone in pure friendship.
Dear Sadsies,I am sorry to hear you've been neglected by your friend. You may already have the answer to your question, since you're evaluating the non-existing bond between yourself and your friend. However, I'll gladly affirm to you that a friendship that isn't reciprocated is not a good friendship.
I have had a similar situation with a friend whom I'd grown up with but who was also consistently a very negative person, a true Debby Downer. One day, I just had enough of her criticism and vitriol. I stopped making excuses for her and dumped her. It was a great decision and I haven't looked back. With that in mind, it could be possible that something has changed in your friend's life, but it's insignificant if she isn't responding to you. It's time to dump her and spend your energy where it's appreciated. Don't dwell on this friend. History is not enough to create a lasting bond, it only means just that—you and your friend have history—so let her be history!
- The Armchair Psychologist