I am Susan Trombetti, celebrity matchmaker, relationship expert and investigator. Although, it may not seem like a serious career to many of you, I have actually been matchmaking for about six years now. People always wonder how I wound up in this business.
It is important to remember making matches can be difficult, exhausting, frustrating and costly. Just look at your picky friend and why you really know she is single compared to why she thinks she is single and you will immediately see the dilemma so many matchmakers face.
Sure, there is a real art to matchmaking but there is also an even more real business aspect. First of all, it is important to take note of the fact that most people you would love to fix up can’t or won’t pay you. They may have seen Patti Stanger on TV and therefore have a preconceived notion of how it works. Professional matchmakers know this field doesn't typically involve charity, and that turning a profit is ultimately the goal. Successful matchmakers have plenty of practical knowledge and know-how about running a business.
Then there are others who think having a business means getting business cards and an office space. For me, however, it is all about thinking like a business owner, which means getting matches for clients, and turning a profit.
I also think a lot about what sets me apart from my competition, and spend much time reflecting on my strengths and weaknesses. It’s a personally challenging business that has helped me grow professionally in too many ways to even state. In short, it kicks my ass everyday. The institute that governs us is very collaborative and willing to help, but one has to have a knack for business, which no third party can impart to you.
While I may not have set out to become an entrepreneur, it’s been good for my daughters and friends to see what becoming self-made looks like. Through this process I have learned that I am a fast learner, with the ability to acquire whatever skillset I am lacking. I've also learned that trusting my gut instincts is key; both for the business and the matching.
My first business, which I personally operated, was an investigations/skip tracing company that I still have but now only use in conjunction with my matchmaking service, which had a unique starting point.
As is usually the case for great women entrepreneurs, the business didn't come from a traditional place. One day, I was relaxing on a beach with my Cosmopolitan Magazine. I read an empowering women’s article about starting a business and how to do it. It was so basic, but also brilliant and I realized that most people don’t think like this. The article said “what is the thing that comes to mind that is easy for you that everyone says you are good at and is difficult for them”? I immediately knew what that was – finding people.
I've always had great investigation skills and could find people anywhere. So, I decided it was time to turn it into a full-time lucrative business. I was so good at this business, in fact, that I never lacked for work. So, again I thought, 'what do I want to do that I am good at it that comes easy to me and hard for everyone else'? Again, I thought people. I then remembered when I found a little old lady the love of her life (a gentle chap from WWII).
From then on out, I knew my career would be centered around people and love. In short, if I could find people, I could find matches for people.
As a woman in matchmaking, I have to tell you it’s even more challenging than the other businesses. Making someone happy, and seeing babies born as a result of your work puts a smile on my face everyday.
How do I do it exactly? To be honest, it’s part secret magic potion and it's part basic people skills. You have to know how to market yourself, network with everyone, manage a team, handle social media, and put yourself out there and go for it.
Being stared at by strangers is something I have become very accustomed to. Not because I am a beautiful, ethereal being that catches everyone's attention (but I will take it if that's what you're thinking), but in the way that I am a Black woman, a Black person, and people tend to notice my presence. I don't think there is a Black person out there that can deny knowing what it's like to be stared at by a random person.