There's a trend on the rise. It's taking hold and creating a safe environment for the rising generation of women to feel comfortable expressing themselves and how they present their image to the wider world.
It's something we, as consumers of media, be it social or otherwise have been been denied for years. First, it was airbrushing, now, it's "I woke up like this." Really, they (the eponymous 'they meaning influencers, celebrities, your pretty BFF) did not wake up like this. It's an ironic lie. But where did it come from?
The nexus of I woke up like this began a couple years ago, and can perhaps even be attributed to Beyoncé with her hit "Flawless" and the Kardashians, who, airbrushed and blow-dried, have posted many photos on social, from bed, with the ironic tag line "I woke up like this" and people have seriously believed them.
And while perhaps this appears seemingly innocent, a joke even, research conducted pertaining to the trend has found, that because of this rhetoric, millennials are increasingly downplaying how long they spend getting ready so as not to appear too overdone or flawless. TRESemmê, who spearheaded the research, found that 7/10 millennials will not tell people how much time they actually spent getting ready, for fear they'll be judged.
Hosted by actress, model and entrepreneur Cara Santana, the panel included psychologist Judy Ho, who worked with TRESemmé on their campaign, Justine Marjan, TRESemmé Global Stylist, Rebecca Minkoff, and Cushnie et Ochs Co-founders Michelle Ochs and Carly Cushnie. Together, the ladies spoke about the importance of transparency in this age of social media, and encouraged women to talk openly about their beauty regimes.
"It's better to arrive late than arrive with bad hair"
This campaign is a veritable lesson in empowerment and speech; don't let what you believe someone might think of you get in the way of what you say. Allow yourself to be completely honest about your beauty prep, own the fact that your hairdo took 2 hours of blood, sweat and tears that morning, because you look good.
TRESemmé hair statement
Judy Ho spoke with SWAAY about the campaign, and why it's so important for millennial women to embrace the beginning of the day as a kickstarter to success, and not an impediment.
"It started with some key figures and celebrities basically saying, 'I don't really work out, I just eat right - and I look like this' and this was a few years ago that statements like this began coming out" Ho begins, continuing, "and then millennials just jumped on it."
"Millennials then start thinking - those are the standards that I have to uphold. The problem, of course, is that it's impossible to uphold," says Ho. Getting ready takes time. No matter what level of sophistication or glamour you're putting into your look. Looking effortless, takes a whole lot of effort. And it's important that girls growing up see that yes, in order for their favorite influencer or actress to look as good as she does, she's probably spent between 1-2 hours - for just a single photo in many cases!
"Work your hair like it's your job"
-Dr. Judy Ho
Cara Santana, Actress, Model and Beauty Entrepreneur, founded The Glam App in 2015 with Joey Maalouf, which is basically an Uber, but for beauty. Order an express blow-out or makeover delivered right to your door (and while that's happening, go stalk her Instagram, because it's simply fabulous), and enjoy the at-home glam experience you've always dreamed of.
Santana saw the white space for a beautified and stylist-specific version of Seamless and dove head-first to wide critical acclaim. Coming to New York for the app's partnership launch with TRESemmé, Santana proved a worthy host for the panel of powerhouse women.
Cara Santana. Photo courtesy of WENN.com
And, until September 23rd, Tresemmé has teamed with The Glam App to get you blow-outs, or "Work It Waves" express delivered to your door, just enter the code "TRESWorkIt" for this hairstyle when you check out and be the glam queen you truly are.
So, in light of the fact that hundreds of videos will surface this week on social channels of the prep for fashion week - please take the "I woke up like this" fad with a grain of salt. Because it really is fake news. The Gigis, Kendalls and Kaias of the world will all spend hours on their appearance, and don' you forget it.
We are living in a time when women are rising to new heights which means they are regularly being confronted with the fear of being "too much". For women in business this is pervasive and costly.
A few ways women can be perceived as "too much" are:
Speaking up about their successes and achievements.
Sharing one too many photos of their cute kids.
Telling one too many people about that date night.
Looking a little too good in that swimsuit.
These can lead to being publicly attacked on social media or privately slandered which in turn leads to women dimming their light and walking on egg shells in hopes of avoiding conflict and judgement.
The minute a woman feels it's unsafe to shine she will begin to overthink, worry, and fear how she shows up in the world.
Forgetting to announce the book is done and the interview is live.
Choosing to focus on what's still on the to-do list rather than what's been checked off.
Many female entrepreneurs are subconsciously altering their behavior in an attempt to not attract too much attention to themselves, rather than focusing on allowing authenticity and magnetism to attract their ideal clients and community.
Women are afraid of being criticized, ostracized, and abandoned by other women for simply being who they are. This leads to quite the quantum when being who you are is simplest way to accelerate the growth of your business.
New research shows men are far more comfortable with self promotion than women are. Researchers found that men rate their own performance 33 percent higher than equally performing women. What we know is that self promotion pays off and this is where women are missing the boat.
The world needs more women to step into leadership roles and no longer be intimidated about creating six and seven figure careers.
Here are five ways to release the fear of being "too much":
1. Approve of yourself.
While it feels good to receive outside validation it will never be enough if you don't first appreciate yourself. The key to having a healthy support system is to make sure you are part of it. Being your biggest critic is what your mother's generation did. It's now time to be your biggest cheerleader. Becoming aware of self talk will reveal what belief is ready to be re-wired. Create a simply mantra that affirms how incredible capable you are.
2. Connect deeply to those you serve.
One powerful way to shift out of people pleasing behavior is to get clear on who actually matters to the wellbeing and success of your life and business. Leadership is not about being the most popular, instead it's a decision to be brave for those who can't be. Take a few minutes each day to visualize and meditate on those your business serves and supports. See your future clients moving toward you every time you choose to stand in your power and use your authentic voice.
3. Remember the legacy you wish to leave.
Having your life purpose and legacy in writing is one of the most transformational exercises you can do. Reading this often will keep you focused on what matters. Knowing what you wish to leave in the hearts of those you love most is incredibly grounding. You didn't come here to keep your mouth shut, dilute your truth, or dim your light-you came here to make a difference.
4. Forgive those who have been unsupportive in the past.
The past has a way of informing the future in a negative way when there is unresolved pain. Take a few minutes to get quiet and ask yourself who you have unforgiveness towards or maybe their name came to mind as you read this article. Listening to a forgiveness meditation or writing a letter to the person you are ready to forgive are both simple and effective ways to process and heal.
5. Be part a community of bright, successful women.
Meaningful relationships with others who have similar aspirations is what will keep you out of isolation and playing small. These connections can happen in a networking group, online community or a local Meetup. Thriving in every area of life is depend on you knowing where you belong and being celebrated there. Don't wait to be invited, go actively seek out people and places that support your dreams and desires.
6. Accept you can have it all.
Women have been fed a lie for generations that says, you can have love or money. Decide you can have it all and allow it to flow to you. You can have a successful career and an amazing mother. You can balance motherhood and loving marriage. Don't let anyone write the rules for you. This is the time to create the life you desire on your terms.
7. Celebrate everything!
The fastest way to leave the haters in the dust is to celebrate everything! At the end of each day lay in bed and recall the best moments. At the end of each week, publicly acknowledge and celebrate what's good in your life. Once a month, have a celebration dinner and share it with those who have helped you in the journey. If there's something good happening, talk about it with everyone who will listen!
May you be a woman who chooses to shine so that others may be reminded of all they can be and do.