Dear Dr. Christine Blasey Ford,
Thank you aren't enough words for what you have done for my life. Your bravery, courage, and testimony have not only triggered me, but also inspired me to reclaim my voice. One month ago, I was sexually assaulted, again. The first time I remained silent and buried it.
The second time, because I have lived this situation before, I chose to not report it. I thought because I knew “how to handle" a situation like this, that not reporting would be the healthiest choice. I was wrong.
The memory of me saying no, and saying how I wanted to go home played like a never-ending movie in my head. It was a clip on repeat that I didn't and still don't know how to turn off. Hearing you speak made me realize I never want to go through the scrutiny that you are going through right now. I never want to see his face on television, and I never want the fear that someone as evil as our perpetrators could run our country and get away with their heinous actions.
After writing an article on “Why I Didn't Report" to help people understand that side of the effects of sexual assault, I grew angry. I grew angry for the injustices you are facing, I grew angry for all the other women and men that faced this injustice and crime, and I grew angry that someone took advantage of my body when I know I clearly stated I did not want to engage in intercourse. I am now 'finally' reporting. I know this justice system does not make it easy for survivors, in fact, I question if they even protect survivors at all. However, I am no longer afraid. I know what they are going to do to me. I know the amount of victim blame I am going to face, but I am at the point where I am empowered to say,' bring it on'.
I will not be submissive to a system that is skewed. I will not succumb to society's judgements, and I will stand up for myself and all the other survivors out there. Whether the DA finds enough evidence or not, I will walk away knowing I did everything I could, rather than sit and wallow like I did the first time. No one will take away my power, strength, and integrity ever again, and you Dr. Ford made me realize that.
Personally, I am over the top excited that we are on the cusp of turning the page on not only a new year but also on a new 10-year window of opportunities and possibilities!
You may be thinking, whoa…I am just embracing the fall season…yikes… it is tough to think about a new decade!
Yet it is this groundwork, this forward thought that you put in place TODAY that will propel you and lead you into greatness in 2020 and beyond. Designing a new decade rests in your ability to vision, in your willingness to be curious, in your awareness of where you are now and what you most want to curate. Essentially, curating what's next is about tapping into today with confidence, conviction, and decision. Leading YOU starts now. This is your new next. It is your choice.
Sometimes to get to that 'next', you need to take a step back to reflect. Please pardon my asking you to spend time in yesterday. Those who know me personally, know that I created and continue to grow my business based on enabling the present moment as a springboard for living your legacy. So, indulge me here! True, I am asking you to peek into the past, yet it is only in order for you to bring the essence of that past forward into this moment called NOW.
One of the best ways to tap into what's next is to clarify what drives you. To design a new decade, ask yourself this question about the past ten years:
What worked? What were my successes?
Make a list of your achievements big and small. Don't type them, but rather use ink and paper and sit with and savor them. Move your thoughts and your successes from your head, to your heart, to your pen, to the paper. Remember that on the flip side of goals not attained and New Year's resolutions abandoned, there was more than likely some traction and action that moved you forward, even if the end result was not what you expected. Once you have a full list of a decade's worth of personal and professional accomplishments, think about how this makes you feel. Do you remember celebrating all of them? My guess is no. So, celebrate them now. Give them new life by validating them. Circle the successes that resonate with you most right now. Where can you lean into those accomplishments as you power into the decade ahead?
Now comes a tougher question, one that I used myself in my own mid-life reinvention and a question I adore because in a moment's time it provides you with a quick reconnect to your unique inner voice.
If it were 10 years ago and nothing were standing in your way, no fear or excuses to contend with…what would you do?
Don't overthink it. The brilliance of this question is that it refocuses purpose. Whatever first came to mind when you answered this for yourself is at its core a powerful insight into defining and redefining the FUTURE decade. Bring your answer into the light of today and what small piece of it is actionable NOW? Where is this resonating and aligning with a 2019 version of yourself?
Then, based on your success list and your answer to the above question, what is your 2020 vision for your business and for the business of YOU?
Designing a new decade begins as a collection of 3,650 opportunities. 3,650 blank slates of new days ahead in which to pivot and propel yourself forward. Every single one of those days is a window into your legacy. An invitation to be, create, explore, and chip away at this thing we call life. One 24-hour segment at a time.
While you have a decade ahead to work on design improvements, you have the ability to begin manifesting this project of YOU Version 2020 right NOW. Based on exploring the exercises in this post, begin executing your vision. Ask questions. Be present. Let go of 2019 and the past 10 years so that you can embrace the next 10. Position acceptance and self-trust at the forefront of how you lead you. One choice at a time.
Don't get bogged down in the concept of the next 10 years. Instead position clarity and intention into each new day, starting today. Then chase every one of those intentions with an in-the-moment commitment and solution toward living a legendary life!